To all struggling parents out there…

This one’s for you.

Currently sitting in a restaurant, next to a family with perhaps 6 y.o. daughter crying. You can hear the mom yelling at her, losing her patience, telling her that it’s becoming a habit (whatever she was doing); grandparents trying to persuade her (which sounds more like giving in to whatever she wants), dad also raising his voice — which made the crying even worse.

For some, it may be a disturbing sight. For some, a usual sight. For me — damn, how I relate 100% with what’s going on. Raising kid(s) is the ultimate tough job.

You can’t control the outcome, you can only do what you know best, many times feeling so so so clueless with the unexpected reaction, the uncontrollable crying or tantrums or silent treatment, the rebellion, the protests. You’ll feel like you’re only losing.

How is one expected to be able to teach, educate and help their kids to be a kind, responsible, accountable, independent human being without losing their sanity? And perhaps their souls too….. It’s a job of a lifetime, one that feels impossible at times.

You want them to be grateful for what they have, instead of focusing on things they don’t have. You want them to be able to control their impulses, not to give in to every “want”. You want them to be able to be responsible for the decisions they make. Yet, irrespective of the hundreds of journals or any reading materials, it didn’t help much with the reality of dealing with this complex human being.

It’s a grueling job, indeed. I can totally understand those who choose not to have kids. Or hate being in a plane with screaming children. I have one (and soon will have two), and am still hesitant bringing a baby into a plane for many reasons.

Point is, if you’re dealing with the same struggle, you are not alone. It is challenging as hell. And you are doing great, regardless of how many times you’ve let yourself off guard, down, let others down, especially your kids. You are trying your best, even if you lose your temper now and then.

You can see them with your heart melting inside, but you can also scream at them for not doing what they’re told to do. It’s humane. Life is about learning, experimenting, trying to get better from time to time. So… it’s completely normal to fail, as long as you get back up again and fight. It’s a never ending battle. But you can do it. In your own way. In your own time. Don’t give up, yet.